…just put it in ya mouth!

 

Thank Goddess For Oral Sex…?

Thank Goddess for Oral SexSo, recently I was splayed back on one of those gorgeous super chunky hand knitted blankets purchased by a very generous caller.  Clad in nothing but my new Louboutin’s courtesy of the same caller (thanks GiGi), my legs were thrown over the shoulders of a very eager and able pussy eater.  I inevitably found myself thinking ‘thank Goddess for oral sex’.  Then my mind began to wander…who invented this orgasmic act?  It’s known by a million different names. But whether you call it cock sucking or carpet munching, be your favorite number 68 or 69, if you’re a spitter or a swallower, I’m sure we can all agree.  Oral sex is the 8th, 9th, and 10th wonder of the world and we all owe a great debt and a big thank you to it’s creator.

 

 

Head Game

So, that night I eventually got my head back into the head game and finally came all over whats-his-name’s face and sent him on his way.  But even after he was long forgotten, the other thought still lingered…who was it that first had the idea to send us on this long and glorious journey downtown?  Now typically, when I find myself contemplating oral sex and my fingers begin to wander, the out cum is much different.  This time, however, my fingers wandered over to Google where I found the most titillating info.  Thought I’d share it with you horny whores.

 

Give head. Give life!

So go online and type the words ‘oral sex’ in the search bar, and you’ll find no shortage of avenues to explore.  Of course, you Have you ever 'Googled' Oral Sex?can find yourself gleefully falling down the rabbit hole of porn from all eras.  Then there’s the route that takes you through a sex-y educational tour of oral sex throughout history.

There are theories that espouse oral sex originated even before we evolved into land dwelling, walking beings.  Sounds fishy…I couldn’t quite envision it.  I did, however, find a few narratives that seemed more probable.  Of course, there is evidence of oral fixation and gratification amongst those ancient Greek freaks.  I also found several articles that say countless ancient frescoes depicting oral sex were found preserved beneath the ashes of Mount Vesuvius in Pompeii.  This erotic art was typically found in bath houses and even a brothel called the Lupanare.  I suspect there were even patrons caught…and frozen in the act of oral sex beneath the volcano’s lava, though I could never find definitive proof.

 

Oral Sex ala Kama Sutra keep's em cumming!Of course, India’s ancient contribution to the orgasmic cause, the Kama Sutra depicts oral sex in every imaginable position.  But the oldest depictions of fellatio and cunnilingus go all the way back to the Ancient Egyptians.  Figures, I suppose, that the only wonder more awe inspiring than the great Pyramids of Egypt would also have it’s origins in the region.  There’s even legend that states that after Egyptian god, Osiris, was murdered and dismembered, a blowjob to his severed penis was what brought him back to life.  Indeed.

 

Let’s Make History!

So…has all this reading sparked an oral fixation for you?  Well, we both know all those thoughts about having a Keep dreaming of Oral Sex! You'll never have these lips wrapped around your pathetic peen. "Nice lips" by gareth.uk is licensed under CC BY-NC-ND 2.0 Keep dreaming. hot woman wrap her lips around your pathetic peen will just continue to be wishful thinking.  But perhaps you can make HerStory, and continue to add to the tongue twisting tradition of oral sex by coming up with all kinds of fun ways to put Mistress’ pleasure where your mouth is.  Can’t wait to hear all about them!

*Wanna hear me read along?